It's been a while since I've been on a first date.
Today, however, I stumbled across a very important piece of important Dating Knowledge scribbled on the back of a Red Robin napkin. This Knowledge is something every first-dater should a) already know or b) keep in the forefront at ALL times.
This little gem of wisdom is as follows:
Worst First Date Foods of All Time
1) Pizza: to eat with fork, or to not eat with fork? That is the question. Eating with a fork is ultimately cleaner, but what if the crust is too tough to cut? Do you give in mid-slice and pick up with your hands? Or do you dive right in with your fingers, not caring that the combed over, mustached, cashmere sweatered man across the table from you is daintily and diligently cutting piece, by piece, by piece. Or maybe it's better to see what he does first. Which, if you're a lady dating a gentleman, he'll wait for you to start eating before he does, which puts you in kind of a pickle. Easy solution: don't order it in the first place.
2) Pasta: three words.... angel-hair-spaghetti-swimming-in-splattering-tomato-sauce-hanging-5-inches-out-of-you-mouth-because-you-clearly-and-painfully-misjudged-the-length-of-said-spaghetti-noodles-and-it's-too-late-to-turn-back-now.
3) Salad: surprising?? Yes. But you know that the one time you're set to impress this filthy rich lawyer slash athlete by ordering a health conscious salad is the one day that the guy in the back prepping that nights dinner got lazy and didn't cut the Romaine lettuce as small as he was supposed to. No one wants to look like a rabbit with a 6" x 6" piece of salad hanging out of your lips.
4) S'mores: think of the last guy you saw eating one. enough said.
These are all foods that should be enjoyed in the comfort of your own home. Or, if you're me, 6 + mo's into the relationship. WINK!!
